Being a mom has come pretty naturally for me. Part of that might be because God planted this desire in my heart as a young child. Part of it might be the hours upon hours I spent caring for my baby dolls. Part might be my natural inclination toward being a care taker. But I think the biggest reason mothering has come so naturally is because of the precious families in my life who have generously shared their children with me. When I think back over my pre-teen and teenage years, my mind is flooded with faces of countless children who I have had the opportunity to love on and learn from. These families trusted me enough to share their precious little ones with me. While at the time it may have seemed (to me) like I was helping them out while also doing something I loved to do. In hindsight, I realize that they were helping me. They were training me, pruning me, and preparing me for the calling God had in store for me--motherhood.
When I was eleven years old, Johnny and Wendy moved to our town to serve as the youth pastor at our church. I was tickled beyond belief to find out that they were expecting their first child. I hoped, oh I hoped, that one day I would be able to babysit their baby. My mom recognized this great longing in my heart and when Andrew was just six weeks old, she offered for her and I to watch him for a few hours one afternoon. That was the beginning of the sweetest relationship I could have imagined. Over the next seven years, Johnny and Wendy graciously shared their precious baby boy (and soon their other son and daughter as well) with me. Since I was homeschooled at the time, Andrew would come to my house one day a week and I would get to "practice" all day. We spent hours playing, giggling, napping, and snuggling. I learned how to feed, soothe, bathe, and entertain a little one. We grew together, actually. I watched Wendy love Andrew so well. I learned from her example. I rejoiced (and cried) when he went to preschool and on to kindergarten. I praised him when he learned to read. I spoke seriously when he disobeyed. I laughed when he was silly. I was at the hospital when he was hurt. I was in the audience when he had his first elementary school performance . I even took him on his first date. All the while, I was learning.
I learned how to be a mommy because this precious family took me into their hearts and shared their most prized possession with me. Their generosity has blessed not only me, but my son as well. I pray that God will give me the same heart of generosity with my John Hudson. I have a selfish tendency to cling to him and save every special moment for myself. But what if God has a special person for John Hudson to minister to, even as a baby boy? What if He has a special person who is watching my example as a mom? What if this whole motherhood thing is way bigger than I ever imagined, stretching across miles and generations? What if, by loving Jesus above all, I can be free to love my family extravagantly and share them without fear or hesitation-- because I realize they were never mine to cling to? Because of Jesus, I can entrust my little one to His care so that I can be free to share him with others. I might never realize the gift I could give someone by sharing my chilren with them. I'm so thankful someone shared with me.
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When we took John Hudson to my hometown for the first time, I was able
to get a photo of Andrew holding John. In this picture, John Hudson is
the same age that Andrew was when I first started caring for him. Priceless I
will always treasure that photo and this sweet family. Thank you for
sharing your blessing.
And so train the young women to love their husbands and children...
Titus 2:4
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